Sunday, January 17, 2010
{ Sunday, January 17, 2010 }
; I survived school like how anyone would survive on a japanese game show.Well school has been alright so far , more of the stupid tamilehs screaming my name from cafe 1 , and chooting.
But i`m already used to it .
Yeah , so lessons already started , and we have gotten our books.
Uniforms not yet , cause no stock , and it`s really irritating.
The girls in my class are super bitchy la ! & i cannot stand this one girl , one day imma fight with her.She clearly don`t know who she messing with. Wrong cookie to fight with la bitch.
Viinod is moving house soon and sanjiv is still not talking to me .
Sighs , some sort of brother you are.
Nevermind not gonna talk about that.
Lately i started talking to sham less , i feel bad but then sighs.
I also don`t know why .
I don`t know why but i just feel like screaming all that i wanna say in here.
Though it won`t be screaming.
I wanna go to the beach and scream everything inside of me to come out .
To let all the hurt and anger in me to just come out and disappear.
Release all the anger , pain , sorrow , hurt and let them dissolve.
I`m not meant to be like that , i`m a happy person . This anger and hurt is really affecting me.
yes , why am i suddenly talking about all this ? I also dont know .
but one thing for sure , i don`t love you as much as i did .
I`m slowly starting to let go , but i know i`ll run back if you come back.
I`m stupid i know , but that is just how i am and its time to accept that fact.
Our friendship started of with me laughing at you for the songs in your phone , but it ended with me crying for you , to be with you.
To understand you was very difficult , but i took that challenge .
& It somehow seemed that i failed , even though i thought i was in the process of winning.
Suddenly in a day , i lost everything . It seemed to me like nothing mattered to you at all .
but i stayed strong , i continued trying , but i just kept failing every single time.
Then came the day where nothing seemed to work out between the two of us except , being friends.
I didn`t mind , but it was hard cause i never took you as a friend to even begin with.
I just wished , you`d had given us a chance.
but i thank you for not giving us a chance , you gave me a chance , to be hurt , and to understand what it is like loving someone who is not meant to be with you .
Though i had been through that , you made it seem tougher , and i learned alot of things also.
Though i said my pm`s wont be to you , somehow it still does refer to you.
I`m sorry , i know i`m making things awkward but what am i supposed to do !? .
I`m trying okay , just know that i am really trying my best.
Coughing sucks .
hahaks , having sorethroat sucks.
Omg , i wonder how Hamzah is .
his operation was on tuesday , and he still hasnt came online , or msged or called.
i really wish you are fine .
You will always remaind that bestfriend (:
I remember every single word u said before going for your operation.
Hamzah , stay strong.
Well , i took medicine but not helping.
But i have to sleep now cause it`s late.
Nights everyone : D
SharenCAUR. !
; i wanted you , but i never got it .
i wanted love , but you never gave it.
i got hurt , but i still loved you.
Everything i ever said , was always true.
